Day 19: Legs and Back, Ab Ripper X

Ah, Friday. My favorite day of the week. Or at least it was, until I foolishly set up my P90X schedule to do Legs and Back on Friday. Hate. This. Workout. I swear it’s more cardio-intense than Cardio X, but then you also get the added bonus of knee pain and that skinny bitch Dreya schooling you in the art of pullups. Awesome!

Anyway, I figured Legs and Back was going to be rough this morning due to the intensity of Yoga X yesterday, and guess what – I was right! Legs and Back is also not meant to be done Bikram style. Oops. However. Even with these things working against me, I got in a pretty good workout and was able to increase reps on most everything, even if only by one or two. I’m not sure I’m really getting a great workout with the pullups, though – I feel like I’m using my legs too much, and I never really feel any soreness in my back muscles the next day. I may try the band again for my next go at this.

Can’t forget Ab Ripper X – so glad I get to do this the day before AND after Yoga X. My favorite part of Ab Ripper X is when Tony says “you shouldn’t work your abs every day.” Um, FUCK YOU MUCH? Correct me if I’m wrong, but the Lean schedule goes like this: Core Syn (all abs), Cardio (abs at the end), S&A plus Ab Ripper (abs), Yoga X (Yoga Belly 7 much? ABS!), L&B plus Ab Ripper (abs), Kenpo. So, I guess technically we’re not doing abs every day. Just five consecutive days each week. Sorry for questioning you, Tony. That’s totally different than every day.

I really brought it to Yoga Belly 7 yesterday so my performance on Ab Ripper X today was somewhat lackluster. Still, I was able to do 220 reps, which is a big improvement from last week and only a few less than what I did on Wednesday. Major soreness now, especially in the upper abs from that godforsaken Touch the Sky move plus Hip Rock and Heels to Heaven.

To avoid a repeat of yesterday’s icky feeling, I decided to have a few extra carbs (and some extra potassium) with breakfast. I worked out, I deserve it. French toast? Cold pizza? No, I had half a peach. That’s right. That’s what happens when you’ve been on Atkins for 10 years. Fruit feels naughty. And it was GOOD. I may even eat the other half later. You hear that, Dr. Atkins?

Day 18: Yoga X

Let me preface this post by saying that it has been 95 degrees in NYC every day for the past week. I work out in my living room, which is about 140 square feet and cooled by one slightly anemic 5,200 BTU window air conditioner. It does a passable job when you’re just lounging in there, but when you’re moving around generating heat, it can’t keep up. That said, Yoga X became Bikram Yoga X today. Word to the wise - Yoga X is NOT meant to be done Bikram style. Just trust me on this. My electrolytes were all fucked up or something, because I simply DID NOT FEEL RIGHT all day after that workout. However, I am happy to report that I was able to do Crane for like 15 consecutive seconds AND I didn’t fall on my face!

The Boyfriend finally decided to sub Plyometrics for Yoga X today and I came home to find him sweating, swearing and generally killing himself. Tony says Plyo is the hardest video of the bunch, and after watching it, I believe him. Plyo is ridiculous. We're people, not frogs. No human should have to jump that much. I was very impressed with The Boyfriend though – he really kicked ass at this video. He played football, basketball and baseball in high school, and a lot of these moves are straight out of the training you’d do for those sports, so he had the coordination down already. The stamina will take work, but he kept up REALLY well for his first go. For me, I’ll have to work on both – makes me glad Plyo isn’t part of my routine yet. P90X Classic is really going to blow.

In other news, my weight is back down to where it was when I started. Annoying, but better than being up 3 lbs. I've heard from some P90X grads that the weight didn't start coming off right away, so I'm trying to be patient. Patient and fat. Fabulous combination!

Day 16: Cardio X

Oh, the day of rest was sweet. But you pay for it the day after. Today was another tough workout (as was yesterday - Core sucks!). Not to toot my own horn, but I am super impressed with myself for not (yet) taking a day off from this insane schedule (other than the scheduled day) - I fully admit that I am a lazy ass, so 16 days on schedule is an accomplishment. I’m even starting to get a little addicted to the feeling of studly awesomeness that I get when I do a P90X workout.

The Boyfriend is not being quite as diligent – his refusal to do Yoga X has translated into a second day off for him rather than a substitute workout, and he skips a lot of exercises in Ab Ripper X (anything that is a full sit-up rather than a crunch hurts his back and makes his sciatica flare up). He is doing the yoga section at the beginning of Cardio X, though, so that is progress! I’m going to try to convince him to do Plyo this week. His arms, chest and shoulders are already showing good results – I’m seeing muscles there that I’ve never seen before!

I am still waking up sore every morning but it’s a little less every day, and once I start working out, I don’t even feel it (until I sit down at my desk for 7 hours afterwards). I’m experiencing some knee pain – I should probably watch my form on the squats and lunges – but it goes away after a day of no legs, so I should be fine with Shoulders and Arms on the schedule for tomorrow. BTW, thank you JEEBUS for S&A. It's the one video that doesn't make me feel like puking from the cardiovascular effort. Too bad I only get to do it for one more week before switching things up!

Day 13: Yoga X

I was right, Yoga X after Legs and Back sucks. However, it doesn’t suck any more than it did after Shoulders and Arms, so I think it’s safe to say that Yoga X just sucks, period. I powered through today though and was really proud of myself – I was able to do probably 95% of everything without stopping. Unfortunately, pretty much the entire missing 5% is during the Warrior III/half-moon/reverse half-moon series. FUCK that series! Oh, and no push-ups between plank/upward/downward dog. Fuck those too.

I have to say that I’m surprised at how quickly I’m seeing improvement in certain areas. I was able to do the full 90 seconds of wall squat during Legs and Back yesterday, for instance, and my cardiovascular endurance has improved to the point where I’m more able to keep up when it comes to reps. I’m able to get off my toes for a few seconds of Crane in Yoga X, which I most certainly could not do my first couple of times through (and I only fell on my face once). Yay!

Day 11: Kenpo X

That’s right, I had to stray from the P90X Lean schedule – you got a problem with that, Tony? I didn’t have time this morning for Yoga X so I did Kenpo X instead, and will do Yoga X on Saturday. I do think there is a bit of a method to Tony’s madness as far as the schedule is concerned, though – doing Kenpo X the day after Arms was tough (especially the block series), and I have a feeling that Yoga X after Legs and Back is going to SUCK.

Now, in other news – I have actually GAINED 3 lbs since starting this program last week. And although I can see that my muscles are firming up, I’m not dumb enough to think this is muscle at this point. I am on the rag, so that is certainly contributing, but still, NOT COOL. I’m not doing this just for weight loss, but I’m not doing it to get fatter either, bitches!

As I mentioned in my intro post, I’m a low-carber, have been for years, so I’ve been sticking with my fairly strict low-carb regime rather than Tony’s nutrition plan (although the first phase of it is relatively low in carbs). The only change I’ve made is switching out my normal breakfast (two eggs with cheese) for a low-carb protein shake (which has less calories and fat than the eggs). However, I have noticed that low-carb and lots of exercise never really work for me. It’s like I can either lose weight by sitting on my ass and eating pounds of bacon, or by working out and eating a few more carbs, but bacon+exercise=no results. So, I’m going to modify a little and scale back on fat while adding a few carbs in the form of more vegetables and perhaps fruit and low-carb bread. I eat about 5% carbs now, all from vegetables or cheese, and I’d like to move to maybe 10-15%. We shall see.

Day 9: Cardio X

Okay, I’ve decided that bitching about these videos on a daily basis makes for a boring blog, so I’m going to scale it back to a couple of posts a week, or just comment when something out of the ordinary happens. Nothing out of the ordinary happened here. This video is HARD, and I was on my knees praising Jeebus (again) at the end that it’s only 40 minutes long. Progress is being made, though - I was able to do like 30 of the Halfback move before I passed out!

Day 8: Core Synergistics

How did I forget how much this video sucks? Anything involving Banana is bullshit. However, I was able to do more pushups today than last week, so I guess that’s progress. I’m being a good little exercise nerd and writing everything down in my handy chart, so it’s easy to see where I need to push myself. Annoying that Tony is always right!

Some bad news on the health front: I went to the gyno last week, and she tentatively diagnosed PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome). We’re waiting on bloodwork to confirm, but she said it was pretty clear from my ultrasound. YAY! For those who don’t know, PCOS means that you get lots of little cysts on your ovaries, but it’s also a metabolic disease that can cause a whole host of fun symptoms, primarily weight gain, hair loss, facial hair growth, infertility, insulin resistance, loss of libido and more. Sound like fun? Yeah right. However, it was comforting to know that there might actually be a reason for some of my recent weight gain (other than just that I’m a fatass). We’ll decide on a course of treatment once the blood results are in. A low-carb diet is typically recommended – but wait, I already do that – and it’s not working. Awesome.

Day 6: Kenpo X

The Boyfriend and I went for this together and what can I say – it kicked my ass, hard core. We managed to keep up with Tony’s pace for most of the exercises, although I took a few breaks. The Boyfriend loves it because it doesn’t stress his bad back/knees, or make him stretch in any way - and punching stuff (even air) makes him feel like a total badass.

I was an absolute WRECK on Sunday – my legs were SO sore from the combination of this and the Leg workout, and frankly I don’t see much Stretch X in my future at all – the day off is just TOO nice.

Day 5: Legs and Back, Ab Ripper X

Pullup bar at the ready, I dove into my first “real” go at Legs and Back. Unfortunately, having done Yoga X a mere 12 hours prior, I was already pretty exhausted. Regardless, this video has a couple of issues for me and other unfit people like me. First, I found myself getting so cardiovascularly winded that I wasn’t able to do some of the reps even though my muscles could have handled it, and second, many of the leg moves require you to squat using just one leg. If (like me), your legs are too weak to do a full-depth squat on just one leg, you may feel like you’re not getting as good a workout as you probably should be. I’m hoping that this will improve with time, but I feel that I might get more out of it if I modify and do more two leg squats with added weight until I’ve built up my strength sufficiently to do at least a few reps with proper form and depth on one leg.

That said, I know my legs got a decent workout. How do I know this? The pullups told me so! I can’t do pullups unassisted, so I used the lowest step on my footstool for assistance. By crouching low, I was able to fully extend my arms and “hang” on the bar, then when it was time to pull up, I pushed up out of the squat to assist. It’s hard to know how much of my weight was being borne by my legs, but going from what I was able to pullup the last time I used the pullup machine at the gym, I would guess I was using my legs for around 60% of my weight. At first it was no problem, but by the end my legs were threatening to give out with every pullup. Oh, and speaking of pullups – screw you, Tony Horton. It is unnatural to expect a woman of any reasonable size (i.e., not that skinny bitch Dreya) to be able to pull up her own body weight! I am 6’ tall and I weigh 190 lbs, which I am relatively certain is MORE than you, Tony. So suck it!!!!!!

My second go at Ab Ripper X was slightly more successful than the first (164 total reps), but no less painful. Really, there are no words for how ridiculous this video is.

Day 4: Yoga X

I didn’t have time for this in the morning due to a doctor’s appointment, so I had my whole work day to anticipate what I now believe is the hardest workout of the whole series (or at least of the videos involved in the first week of P90X Lean). GOD THIS VIDEO SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!! You keep looking up, thinking you’re almost done, but the clock never seems to budge. I will say that after the first 45 mins of moving asanas, the second half is (mostly) easy, although make no mistake, you are still working. Tony’s love affair with Warrior and then of course the horrifyingly difficult half-moon series are just killer. I was sweating, shaking and nauseated afterward, and I only did about 80% of the hardest stuff. I must always make time for this in the morning because I HATE working out in the evening and the length of this makes it extra painful.

The Boyfriend simply refused to try this and went for a long walk instead. Next week, he’ll do it, even if I have to keep my foot in his ass for the full 90 mins.

Day 3: Shoulders and Arms, Ab Ripper X

This was still a bit of a fact-finding mission as I wasn’t sure what weight I should be using for all of the exercises. I guessed pretty well for the most part, though – 8s for anything bicep related, 3s for triceps, and 5s for other stuff. Some of the shoulder exercises required 10s. Yes, I know these are small weights. Too goddamn bad. I’m a girl, and I’m not looking for bulk, and fuck you Dreya for being half my size and using 12s for everything. These weights allowed me to do around 15 reps of each exercise, which was my goal.

Due to time constraints, I skipped the bonus round and cool-down and moved directly to Ab Ripper X. I’m happy to report that I didn’t reinjure my tail. Sitting on a pillow for exercises that hurt alleviated the problem. I did a total of 146 exercises, or a little more than a third of the video. I am no longer able to roll over in bed, balance on the subway, suck in my gut, or possibly, have children. Yes, it hurts that badly.

The Boyfriend thoroughly enjoyed this video – a) because his arms are already pretty strong, b) because he sees fast results when he does arm work and c) because he skipped Ab Ripper X. He will not get away with this next time.

Day 2: Cardio X

Thank you Jeebus that this video is only 40 mins long. Doing this today at 100% capacity left me barely able to move. My abs were already sore from Core, so the Superman/Banana at the end pretty much didn’t happen. Oh, and that knee-to-elbow move? The Halfback or something? That also didn’t happen much – about 15 in and I was gasping for air. The most annoying thing about this video, though, is how NOT out of breath Tony and his minions are. That and the fact that he loves to stick it to you at the end by putting all the really hard stuff last. Suck it, Tony!

Day 1: Core Synergistics

In the extreme spirit of P90X, I decided to give this my all today, taking breaks only when I thought I might throw up. This happened several times. What can I say? This is, as it’s supposed to be, a challenging workout. I think the name is a bit of a misnomer, though – I would call this cardio with a core emphasis, rather than just core. It really works everything – there are plenty of lunges and pushups in addition to core stuff, but the real challenge is the cardio aspect, at least for me. I used 2lb dumbbells for everything and found that to be plenty of weight at this point. The Boyfriend was NOT impressed with this video – which means he needs to do it more! His bad back makes some of the exercises difficult and painful, but all that much more necessary.

Fit Test

Fit test day! No big surprises here. The fit test isn’t really difficult, and IMO doesn’t really prepare you for the reality of the videos. I mean, 2 minutes of jumping jacks? Please. That’s the warmup for most of these videos. But anyway, The Boyfriend and I did the fit test – I passed everything but the pullups, although my pushup technique is very questionable (and I do them on my knees). The Boyfriend did not fare as well – he failed the flexibility, pushup and pullup portions. However, he has much more upper body strength than I do and will no doubt improve quickly as we move along. We both “failed” the ab section as well, but we weren’t doing the exercise correctly and I think if we had been we’d have been fine. We bought a pullup bar so we’re ready to go!